heart over mind, mind over matter;
Mar 2, 2010;
looking at the last post, guess i should be glad i hadnt been here for so long. yet i dunno why im here agn, talking abt this agn.
i guess im under a lot of stress right now, feeling the consequences of dao-ing 6 wks of sch work. hall isnt really getting hiong, but it will be soon. sch work is just piling as it goes along, and i hadnt even try digging myself out of it.
but the main thing's nvr sch; it nvr was. i tot i was really getting over it, esp like since recently i was thinking abt how it's started to feel so natural and normal that it really might be normal. then i hear him talk abt his internship and everything just triggers back to reality. that my time with him is very little, and it's running out on me.
i dunno whether these mixed feelings are because i'm still very much into him, or is it just because i'm not used to (and nvr will be) the fact that i cant accept change. maybe its that. or maybe its just that i really dun wanna lose him. if so, then is it because i truly dun wanna lose him, or is it just cause i dun wan anything to change around me? if its the latter, then obviously im being too selfish.
algebra mid term's tml, and i hadnt started on it much. not to mention i got tutorials and lab and cca work to do. somehow i feel i really need to wake up and stop being a kid.
its time to grow up, and i guess my 20th is the day to start the gears turning.
.... dun wanna wake up from this dream ....
